During my stay at an expensive hotel in New York City, I woke up in the middle of the night with an upset stomach. I called room service and ordered some soda crackers. When I looked at the charge…

A man enters the emergency room with two black eyes, multiple lacerations, and a seven iron wrapped around his neck. The doctor pulls him into one of the examining rooms and says, “What the hell…

Christmas is a great time of happy and togetherness, but it’s easy to forget that many people face difficulties during the season and may not feel its warmth. Therefore, the fascination of the…

Three mischievous grandmas were sitting on a bench outside a nursing home. An old man walked by, and one of the grandmas yelled out, “Bet we can guess exactly how old you are.”The old man said, “There…

Fred was about to go on a hunting trip when he noticed his 21 year old son Jack walking up to him. "Hey Dad," Jack asked. "Can I go hunting with you?" Fred had many reservations…

An Airbus 380 is on its way across the Atlantic. It flies consistently at 800 km/h in 30,000 feet, when suddenly a Eurofighter with Tempo Mach 2 appears. The pilot of the fighter jet slows down, flies…

A jobless man applied for the position of ‘office boy’ at a very big company. The employer interviewed him, then a test: clean the floor. “You are hired.” – the employer said. “Give me your email…

My wife and I have this running battle over the temperature setting for our air conditioning. She wants it set cooler. I want it set warmer. After a recent verbal exchange, she finally shouted,…

Dad had the opportunity to buy his medications directly from the pharmacy company. “Here is your prescription sir, that will be $515 dollars.” Dad was a bit hard of hearing so he only heard the $15.…

A blonde has failed the written driving test four times. At the fifth attempt, she was determined to pass: But the test had the same question. “You are driving at 100 mph. On your right is a wall, on…

A man is getting into the shower just as his wife is finishing up when the doorbell rings.The wife quickly wraps herself in a towel and runs downstairs. When she opens the door, there stands Bob, the…

Two blonde sisters, Abby and Amy went fishing and decided to rent a boat on a lake. After fishing for hours at various spots and catching nothing, they decided to try one more time before calling it…

YOU MIGHT BE A PREACHER IF... - You've dreamed you were preaching, only to awaken and discover you were. - A church picnic is no picnic. - You wish people would die at more appropriate times. -…

At school, Little Johnny’s classmate tells him that most adults are hiding at least one dark secret, so it’s very easy to blackmail them by saying, “I know the whole truth.” Little Johnny decides to…

Mr. and Mrs. Morrison were on a safari in Africa. As they were walking through the jungle, a huge lion comes creeping out towards them, ready to pounce. "Shoot!" Mrs. Morrison screamed to…

A guy walks into a clinic to have his blood type taken. The nurse goes about taking the blood sample from his finger after finishing she looks around for a piece of cotton to wipe away the excess…

How many dogs does it take to change a light bulb? Border Collie: Just one. Then I’ll replace any wiring that’s not up to code. Rottweiler: Make me! Lab: Oh, me, me! Pleeease let me change the light…