1. Salmonella won't be a concern. 2. Everyone will think your turkey is Cajun blackened. 3. Uninvited guests will think twice next year. 4. Your cheese broccoli lima bean casserole will gain…

How many dogs does it take to change a light bulb? Border Collie: Just one. Then I’ll replace any wiring that’s not up to code. Rottweiler: Make me! Lab: Oh, me, me! Pleeease let me change the light…

An old cowboy, dressed to kill with his cowboy shirt, hat, jeans, spurs and chaps went to a bar and ordered a drink.As he sat there sipping his whiskey, an attractive young lady sat down next to…

Fresh out of seminary, a young pastor found an associate position at a prestigious church. One Sunday early on, he was given the opportunity to preach. He prepared diligently - perhaps a bit too…

A blonde is driving in her mini down the high way when she notices another blonde in a boat out in the middle of a corn field. The blonde in the boat was rowing the boat. The blonde was very…

One day, a 5 year old boy went to visit his granny.Playing with his toys on the back porch while grandma was dusting, he looked up and said,“Grandma, why don’t you have a boyfriend now that grandpa…

  These three drunk guys decide to go to the joy house. The madam sees them coming and tells the girls to just throw some blow up dolls in the rooms and turn the lights out. The guys are so drunk the…

Three Kids are arguing about who’s dad is the fastest.At lunch the first boy says,“My dad is the fastest because he is a brick layer & when he drops a brick from the 5th floor he can run to the…

A man phones his wife and asks her: “Honey I’ve been asked to go fishing in China with my boss for a week. This is a good opportunity for me to get the promotion. So could you please pack enough…

Maria just got married, and being a traditional Italian, she was still a virgin.So, on her wedding night, staying at her mother’s house, she was nervous.But her mother reassured her.“Don’t worry…

Three scruffy-looking bikers entered the truck stop where an elderly man was dining. The first biker chuckled and sat down at the counter as they passed the elderly man after pushing his cigarette…

A lady comes home from her doctor’s appointment grinning from ear to ear.Her husband asks, “Why are you so happy?”The wife says, “The doctor told me that for a forty-five year old woman, I have the…

A man was away on a business trip, and decided to call his wife to let her know he had arrived safely.A little girl picks up the phone.“Hello?”“Hi, honey. This is Daddy. Is Mommy near the phone?”…

An Englishman, a Frenchman, a Spaniard, and a German are all watching a dolphin do some excellent tricks. The dolphin notices that the four gentlemen have a very poor view, so he jumps higher out of…

Mom: Time to wake up and go to school! Son: No, I don’t wanna go to school today! Mom: But you have to go to school. Son: But, I don’t wanna go to school. Mom: Give me three good reasons why you…