Two farmers were bragging about how effective each other's scarecrows were. "My scarecrow is so scary," the first farmer said. "That it frightened every single crow off of my…

The wife comes home loaded with parcels and laughing says to her husband “Honey, I was doing some shopping when I ran out of money. So I came to your office but since you weren’t there,I took 500…

A man who drank alot was told by his wife “If you ever come home drunk again, I’m going to leave you”. Regardless, that night he went out to a pub and drank a lot and was sick all over his shirt. He…