*You’ve worn out the handle on your favorite coffee mug
*You go to AA meetings just for the free coffee
*You’ve worn the finish off you coffee table
*Instant coffee takes too long
*You name your cats “Cream” and “Sugar”
*The Taster’s Choice couple wants to adopt you
*Starbuck’s owns the mortgage on your house
*You’re so wired you pick up FM radio
*Your life’s goal is to “amount to a hill of beans”
*Your lips are permanently stuck in the sipping position
*Your first-aid kit contains two pints of coffee with an I.V.
hookup
*You want to be cremated just so you can spend eternity in a coffee can
