In a trial, a Southern small-town prosecuting attorney called his first witness, a grandmotherly, elderly woman to the stand.
He approached her and asked, โMrs.
Jones, do you know me?โ
She responded, โWhy, yes, I do know you, Mr.
Williams.
Iโve known you since you were a boy, and frankly, youโve been a big disappointment to me.
You lie, you cheat on your wife, and you manipulate people and talk about them behind their backs.
You think youโre a big shot when you havenโt the brains to realise youโll never amount to anything more than a two-bit paper pusher.
Yes, I know you.โ
The lawyer was stunned.
Not knowing what else to do, he pointed across the room and asked, โMrs.
Jones, do you know the defence attorney?โ
She again replied, โWhy yes, I do.
Iโve known Mr.
Bradley since he was a youngster, too.
Heโs lazy, bigoted, and he has a drinking problem.
He canโt build a normal relationship with anyone, and his law practice is one of the worst in the entire state.
Not to mention he cheated on his wife with three different women.
One of them was your wife.
Yes, I know him.โ
The defence attorney nearly died.
The judge asked both counsellors to approach the bench and, in a very quiet voice, said, โIf either of you idiots asks her if she knows me, Iโll send you both to the electric chair.
