An old lady is speeding down a highway, when she spots a police officer with a speed gun.
The officer signals for her to pull over, and then walks over and asks her with a smile:
โWhatโs the rush?โ
โIโm late for work.โ
โSure,โ says the officer, โWhat do you do?โ
โIโm a rectal distender.โ
โA what?
A rectal distender?
And what is that, exactly?โ
โWell, you see, I start by putting a finger in, then another, then I work up to three fingers, four fingers, until the whole hand is in.
I work from side to side until I can get both hands in, and then slowly but surely I extend the rectum, until itโs about 6 feet wide.โ
โAnd what the hell do you do with a 6 feet asshole?โ
โGive him a speed gun and put him by the side of the road.โ