HumorJokes

Joke: Am I Dead

All of a sudden, he wakes up with an elderly man dressed in a cowl standing in front of his bed.

โ€œWhat the hell are you doing in my bedroom?

and who are you?โ€ he asked.

โ€œThis is not your bedroom,โ€ the man replied, โ€œI am St.

Peter, and you are in heaven.โ€ โ€œWHAT!

??

Are you saying Iโ€™m dead?

I donโ€™t want to die โ€“ Iโ€™m too young.โ€ said Harry.

โ€œIf Iโ€™m dead, I want you to send me back immediately.โ€

โ€œItโ€™s not that easyโ€, said St.Peter, โ€œyou can only return as a dog or a hen.

You can choose on your own.โ€

Harry thought about it for a while, and figured out that being a dog is too tiring, but a hen probably has a nice and relaxed life.

Running around with a rooster canโ€™t be that bad.

โ€œI want to return as a hen.โ€ Harry replied.

And in the next second, he found himself in a chicken run, really nicely feathered.

But, man, now โ€œheโ€ felt like the rear end was gonna blow, then along came the rooster.

โ€œHey, you must be the new hen on the farm.โ€ he said.

โ€œHow does it feel?โ€ โ€œWell, itโ€™s OK I guess, but it feels like my rear end is blowing up.โ€ โ€œOh that!

โ€ said the rooster.

โ€œThatโ€™s only the ovulation going on.

Have you never laid an egg before?โ€ โ€œNo, how do I do that?โ€ Harry asked.

โ€œCluck twice, and then you push all you can.โ€ Harry clucked twice, and pushed more than he was good for, and then โ€˜Plopโ€™ and an egg was on the ground.

โ€œWowโ€ Harry said, โ€œthat felt really good!

โ€ So he clucked again and squeezed โ€“ and you better believe that there was yet another egg on the ground.

The third time he clucked, he heard his wife shout:

โ€œHarry, for Godโ€™s sake wake up, youโ€™re shitting all over the bed!

โ€

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