Jokes

A husband is at home watching a football game when his wife interrupts, “Honey, could you fix the light in the hallway? It’s been flickering for weeks now.” He…

A man goes to the dentist to have a tooth pulled.The dentist takes out a needle to give the man a shot of Novocain. “No way, no needles, I can’t stand…

A woman was out golfing one day when she hit her ball into the woods.She went into the woods to look for it and found a frog in a trap. The frog said to her,…

A girl was having an affair while her father was at work. One day she was in bed with her boyfriend when, to her horror, she heard her father’s car pull into…

There were three nuns, they all told the priest that they were going to do one sin each. So the priest says ok, do your sins, come back, and I’ll bless you. So,…

Home Funny A Blonde Arrived For Her First Golf A blonde arrived for her first golf lesson and the pro asked her to take a swing at a ball to see how she’d do.…

Satan appeared before a small town congregation. Everyone started screaming and running for the front church door, trampling each other in a frantic effort to…

Little Johnny pulls down his shorts and says, “I have one of these and you don’t.” The little girl starts crying and crying and runs home to her mother. The…

Home Funny A lady goes in to take a tennis lesson A lady goes in to take a tennis lesson, and the instructor notices she is using the wrong grip. After several…

A young man from Minnesota moves to Florida and goes to a big “everything under one roof” department store looking for a job. The manager asks, “Do you have any…

A blonde was sitting in the window seat on a plane when a young business executive sat down in the aisle seat beside the beautiful young girl. After several…

Home Funny Dan married one of a pair of identical twins. Dan married one of a pair of identical twins. Less then a year later he was in court filing for…

Eleven people were hanging on a rope under a helicopter — ten men and one woman. The rope wasn’t strong enough to carry them all, so they decided that one…

Home Funny Grandpa found a bottle of power tablets Grandpa and Grandma were visiting the kids overnight, when Grandpa found a bottle of Man power tablets in his…

A man was driving down the road. He passed a traffic camera and saw it flash. Astounded he had been caught speeding when he was doing the speed limit, he turned…

A census taker in a rural area went up to a farmhouse and knocked. When an old woman came to the door, he asked her how many children she had and their ages.…

Three old men were sitting on a bench when a reporter approached them. “I wonder if you three would be willing to do an interview and tell me your secret to…

A few days after Christmas, a mother was working in the kitchen listening to her young son playing with his new electric train in the living room. She heard the…

An 80 year old man was having his annual checkup when the doctor asked how he was feeling. “I’ve never been better!” he boasted. “I’ve got an 18 year old bride…