Jokes

Paddy and Murphy are working on a building site. Paddy says to Murphy “I’m gonna have the day off. I’m gonna pretend I’m mad!” He climbs up the rafters, hangs…

A male patient is lying in bed in the hospital, wearing an oxygen mask over his mouth and nose. A pretty, young, student nurse appears to give… A student asked…

Two friends rented a boat and fished in a lake every day. One day they caught 30 fish. One guy said to his friend, “Mark this spot so that we can come back here…

A male patient is lying in bed in the hospital, wearing an oxygen mask over his mouth and nose. A pretty, young, student nurse appears to give him a partial…

A guy walks into a clinic to have his blood type taken. The nurse goes about taking the blood sample from his finger after finishing she looks around for a…

Out of breath, he asked, “Please, may I hide under your skirt? I’ll explain later.” The nun agreed… A moment later two Military Police ran up and asked,…

After retiring, I went to the Social Security office to apply for Social Security. The woman behind the counter asked me for my driver’s License to verify my…

A lady goes to the bar on a cruise ship and orders a Scotch with two drops of water. As the bartender gives her the drink she says, “I’m on this cruise to…

Jack wakes up with a huge hangover after attending his company’s Christmas Party. Jack is not normally a drinker, but the drinks didn’t taste like alcohol at…

An 83 year old british gentleman arrived in Paris by plane. As he was fumbling in his bag for his passport a stern French lady asked if he had been to France…

admin · January 16, 2024 · Ever been stuck behind a customer with way too many items in a shop’s express lane? A Walmart customer recently shared this story of…

They all arrive at the Pearly Gates and Saint Peter says “Let me ask you a question before admitting you to heaven.” To the first he says “My son, while on…

Late one evening a Marine pulled into a little town, only to find that every hotel room was taken. When he finally got to the last hotel, he pleaded to the…

admin · January 16, 2024 · Ever been stuck behind a customer with way too many items in a shop’s express lane? A Walmart customer recently shared this story of…

Husband always insisted on making love in the dark. After 20 years wife turns on the light, finds him holding a vibrator. She goes ballistic, “You impotent…

The following is an actual question given on a University of Arizona chemistry mid-term and an actual answer turned in by a student. The answer by this student…

Home Funny Customer Enters ‘Express Lane’ with Too Many Items Ever been stuck behind a customer with way too many items in a shop’s express lane? A Walmart…

One day, a farmer went out and bought a brand new stud rooster for his chicken coop. The new rooster struts over to the old rooster and says, “OK, old-timer,…

Four guys are in the hospital waiting room because their wives just had babies. One of the nurses walks up to the first guy and says,  “congratulations! You…