Jokes

Frankie: "So, I took my girlfriend out for dinner at this fancy restaurant last night; she orders a bowl of soup, and wouldn't you know it, she finds…

There was an old priest who got sick of all the people in his parish confessing to adultery.One Sunday, in the pulpit, he said, “If I hear one more person…

Harold and Jack are about to rob a bank. Harold says, "All right, Jack, now here's what to do: go into that bank with this gun and this bag, hold the…

A priest and a nun are having a tennis match…The priest is very competitive, but can’t seem to bring his A-game to the nun who is clearly better. After a volley…

Do all fairy tales begin with “Once upon a Time”?No, many of them begin “If I am elected, I promise …”Little Johnny attended a horse auction with his father.He…

When you're over 60... 1. Kidnappers are not very interested in you. 2. In a hostage situation, you will likely be released first. 3. No one expects you to…

As soon as the newlyweds returned from their honeymoon the young bride called her mother, who lived a couple of hours away. “How did everything go?” her mom…

Out of breath, he asked, “Please, may I hide under your skirt? I’ll explain later.” The nun agreed… A moment later two Military Police ran up and asked,…

A minister had just finished an excellent fried chicken dinner at the home of a congregation member when he saw a rooster come strutting through the yard.…

Two old ladies Dolly and Ruby were talking about their grandchildren. Dolly said, “Each year I send each of my grandchildren a card with a generous…

A Horse and an Ass were traveling together. The Horse prancing along in its fine trappings.The Ass carrying with difficulty the heavy weight in its panniers. “I…

A man walks into a pet store and asks for a talking bird. The owner takes him to a parrot and says, "This parrot is guaranteed to speak after a little…

A crowded American Airlines flight was canceled. A single agent was re-booking a long line of inconvenienced travelers. Suddenly, an angry passenger pushed his…

  A crowded American Airlines flight was canceled. A single agent was re-booking a long line of inconvenienced travelers. Suddenly, an angry passenger pushed…

Little Johnny is visiting his grandma for the weekend. "Would you like a piece of cake, Johnny Dear?" Grandma asks. "Yes, please," Johnny…

A blonde and a redhead have a ranch. They have just lost their bull. The women need to buy another, but only have $500. The redhead tells the blonde, “I will go…

I was just having a conversation with someone who is about to buy a Mac computer. I was against it and an argument started. I said there were too few people…

An old woman is riding in an elevator in a very lavish New York City Building, when a young and beautiful woman gets into the elevator, smelling of expensive…

While entering the elevator to heaven, a confused client accidentally pushed the down button. Arriving at the basement, the door opened to reveal the devil…

An old man is laying in bed, he only has a day or two left. He wakes up to the smell of his favorite thing in the world, chocolate chip cookies baking in the…