Jokes

A customer wanted to ask his attractive waitress for a date, but couldn't get her attention. When he was able to catch her eye, she quickly looked…

A man is walking across a bridge when he notices a little boy crying. Concerned, he walks up to the boy and asks, "Say, what's wrong, young…

An American manufacturer is showing his machine factory to a potential customer from a foreign country. At noon, when the lunch whistle blows, two thousand men…

The wedding was a beautiful affair and the reception equally stunning, the guests had all settled down with drinks in hand. A prayer for the food and a toast to…

My wife had never been to a baseball game, so I took her to see the Cincinnati Reds one night. Our seats were right behind the third-base line. At the top…

At a girl's college dormitory, dates were permitted only on Saturday night. One young man showed up on a Tuesday evening, explaining to an older woman in…

The Boston Symphony was performing Beethoven's Ninth. In the piece, there's a long passage about 20 minutes during which the bass violinists have…

A little known fact: Aesop used to moonlight as a waiter in a small restaurant in his home city. While taking orders one day, he heard a diner call out,…

A preacher at a Christian school, wanted to point out the proper behavior for church. He was trying to elicit from the youngsters, rules that their parents…

Top 5 Signs You Probably Should be Exercising More: Your five-year-old walking shoes look brand new. Underneath that pile of cobwebs is your rowing…

A priest was talking to a group of kids about "being good" and going to heaven. At the end of his talk, he asked, "Where do you want to…

Mr. Johnson: "Honey, it's been a while since the Worthingtons have been over for a visit." Mrs. Johnson: "And I don't think…

Stopping to pick up my daughter at kindergarten, I found out that the topic of "Show and Tell" that day had been parents' occupations. The…

The manager of a restaurant called his wait staff together. "Okay, everyone," he said. "I want you all to look your best today. Greet every…

In my sociology class, we were instructed to write down answers to some questions the teacher was asking. "Next question," announced the…

When a man's dog died, he took it to the local Baptist church. He asked the preacher if he could have a funeral service for his much loved pet, but the…

The chef at a hotel approaches the manager one afternoon. "Ma'am," she asks. "What might be the best way to announce dinner? Should I say…

Two daughters were having a discussion about family resemblance. "I look like Mom," said my nine-year-old, "but I have Dad's eyes and…

At school, Little Johnny’s classmate tells him that most adults are hiding at least one dark secret, so it’s very easy to blackmail them by saying, “I know the…

A guy walks into a clinic to have his blood type taken. The nurse goes about taking the blood sample from his finger after finishing she looks around for a…