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Two men are in a bar getting drunk.
Suddenly one of them throws up all over himself.
He says, โOh, no.
Now my wife will kill meโ.
His friend says, โDonโt worry.
Just tuck a twenty dollar bill in your front pocket and tell your wife that someone threw up on you and gave you twenty dollars for the dry cleaning billโ.
So they stay for another couple of hours and get even drunker.
Eventually he reels home and his wife starts to give him a bad time:
โYou reek of alcohol and youโve thrown up all over yourself, youโre disgustingโฆโ
Speaking very carefully so as not to slur, he says, โWait.
Itโs not what you think.
I only had one drink, but this man was sick on me.
Heโd obviously had one too many, or else he just couldnโt hold his liquor.
He was very sorry and he gave me twenty dollars for the cleaning bill.
Look in my front pocket.โ
She looks in his front pocket and says, โBut this is forty dollarsโ.
โAh, yes,โ says the man.
โHe peed in my trousers tooโ.